An update for those who didn't get the email...

Well- apparently my little jaw problem causes "real" doctors, even chiefs of surgery with years of experience, to shake their heads a whole, whole lot. The doctor in Dallas (Dr. Triplett) was really great though and he was able to give us the direction we needed and we ended up getting two opinions because he took my MRIs and went and showed them to his "buddies" and brought another surgeon in to check out my jaw to verify if what the MRI was saying was really true...so that was good. Both of these surgeons agree that I should definitely NOT have Arthroplasty (that's where they either replace or remove my displaced jaw discs) but rather should have at least the upper jaw surgery and maybe a combination upper and lower jaw surgery (this is called orthognathic surgery) so that my jaw bones and basically my maxillofacial structure can be reorganized surgically so that my jaws and teeth fit together again. This would, hopefully take the force off my back teeth and thereby off my jaw joints which would, hopefully, relieve a) my jaw pain and b) the pretty horrible muscular strain it takes to close my mouth each time. so- even though this surgery option is in itself scarier and a bigger deal- at least this means that 3 surgeons agree strongly that i should follow this route- leaving only one surgeon- namely Dr. Bolding- who messed up my first surgery- out in the cold as the only surgeon recommending the arthroplasty. so as far as WHAT surgery to have- I think it's fairly clear that I should have the upper jaw surgery (aka orthognathic). this means I need to get an orthodontist and oral surgeon that work together and also get my insurance to pay for it. no easy task indeed. my first step is to contact insurance and get on that. it could take a while. meanwhile I am applying for a job in special collections here in my library. if i get that job i will almost certainly stay in arkansas, try to get the surgery done in a year- and start grad school in aug 2006. this would be my ideal situation. if this worked out i would have dr. anderson in LR do the surgery and just commute and use my vacation days for the surgeon and orthodontist appointments which would be hard but ok. if i don't get the special collections job- I will just keep applying for texas jobs and move if i get one. the doctors in dallas said that finding a really good surgeon and orthodontist in san antonio would take about 2 seconds- so that option is still definitely in the works. i have about 15 applications out right now- and assuming i don't get this special collections job- i am certainly still very interested in moving to san antonio- but i haven't gotten call backs from any of the applications yet. i mean it's early in the running for many of them- but it's a little disheartening nonetheless.So i'm really thankful for the direction we got and now I just need to figure out insurance and my job and I think i'll be able to move forward successfully.i start my class in jewish philosophy today which ROCKS. oh and we did go see the exhibit on the emperor of china and it was really good. and the rest of the dallas museum of art was also quite good. i recommend it if you get the chance.ok- thanks for everything. much love,felicia

Splendor's of the forbidden city...

Well, well, well- seems the time has finally come for yee old familial juggernot (sp?) to sail off for Dallas to see the surgeon there about my little, iddy-biddy jaw which may or may not be a sinking ship. Sick of the oceanic imagery? me too. Anyhow- so Sunday- if all goes well- my mom, dad and I are going to load up the van and head down to Dallas. It is my supreme desire to get my museum fix by visiting the Dallas Museum of Art- which- it so happens- is holding a world-reknowned exhibit entitled "The Splendors of China's Forbidden City: The Glorious Reign of Emperor Qianlong"- which- being the grand Duchess of the eurASIAN landmass- is of course of utmost interest. Plus- it's been many moons since i've taken in a good museum. So- hopefully the rent's'll cough up the 15 smackers it costs to get in and we'll go enjoy it together.
Then it's to the hard stuff- no- not jack daniels- the oral surgeon. Monday morning we'll carry the stack of MRI's and x-rays and records and medical letters and all that jazz and see what the good doctor- and by good doctor i hope i mean the BEST- he's pretty much the best guy in the field- and we'll just lay it all out there and see what he can come up with. Best case scenario- he'll say it can be fixed with the easier surgery and that I can move on with my life in a year. Worst case- we're looking at 3 years and two surgeries and a move. Either way- I just need strength and some answers.
Ok- thanks for your support. Be thinking about me- i'll need some help through this. I've got God and a sense of humor and you guys- so with all that- i'll make it.
Love ya,
Felicia

Catepillars in my GUT!?! + AIN'T GOT no JOB

So i've been a waiting to hopefully hear about getting the job here before posting- and I just finally found out that I didn't get the job. She said that personality-wise she thought I was by far the best candidate (that makes about the fifth or sixth time i've heard that one). I've resigned myself to that and have continued applying for other jobs in Texas- most of which are secretarial which isn't ideal- but if it would get me insurance- I'll take it i suppose. I've got my hat in the round for a job with Special Collections here at the U of A which would be good for me professional-development wise as well as monetarally (adding 3,700 a year)...and I've got about 5 or 6 applications out to jobs in Texas. Other than that I have this weird thing where for the past 2-3 weeks I've felt the constant urge to puke. yep, yep- never-ending nausea- which is weird cause my stomach is the one thing that was in working order for me. so yeah- i don't know what the problem is- but the onion horoscopes (by far the most HILARIOUS horoscopes out there) have offered me one explanation:
Leo: (July 23—Aug. 22) If you'd only learned to exercise patience, those caterpillars you've been vomiting up all week would've had a chance to become lovely stomach butterflies.
Now that's a lovely thought.
Anyhow- I go to Dallas for that super-duper third opinion on my surgery on Monday so then I'll know a lot more about my problem and about my near future. that'll be good. hope everyone is doing awesome! much love- effie from the trot.

Shall we all ameliorate something today...

Word of the Day for Wednesday May 11, 2005:

ameliorate \uh-MEEL-yuh-rayt\, transitive verb: To make better; to improve.

intransitive verb: To grow better.

Among the pressures provoking these distresses were a father's financial inadequacy and a growing awareness that, by finding employment himself, he could ameliorate the family's exiguous circumstances.--Terence Brown, [1]The Life of W. B. Yeats

Forgotten Prime-Time Momentitos

So the lovely Yessie reminded me of two BRILLIANT moments from this weekend. the first came when were perusing that isle of crap that you find in every grocery store- ya know the one with yard ornaments and kitchen gatchets and tshirts that say #1 grandma and stuff like that? well we were gazing in awe-filled silence at the bounty when we caught site of the PURRRfect gift for miss kristin rose- and what is, dare i say, to become our campus house mascot- pretty kitty. it's a chalky white cat figurine, slightly beat up from being picked up and quickly rejected, and it has a pretty scary face- and by scary- i mean BEAUTIFUL AND PURRRFECT!!! oh man it's great. it's lips are painted pink except the painter missed the mark a bit and dribbled some and so it looks as though pretty kitty is dribbling some blood- eewwwweee- and then- here's the best part- it's eyes look CREEEEPY- they are shockingly blue and are looking up with eery dread. yep- eery dread. you have to see it to believe it. as you might imagine- kristin loves her present. and we couldn't be happier about it.
the second prime-time, good-times moment came when yessie and i found out, that- though "i'm just effie from the trot- used to have a little- now i have a lot" - i'm NOT the only effie around! you simply MUST go to www.effie.com.au it's freaken hilarious. we can't really figure out what this girl does for a living- but we can discern that she's a true megalomaniac. and don't be thinken she's a stripper just because of the boa on her intro website- it's not dirty- just interesting- i promise- and i wouldn't lie to ya pretty babies!!!
k- ciao ciao.
effie

Oye Weh!

So I'm at the ole 'brary just chillin' and thrillin' like a villain- you know how it is...and i thought i'd get everybody who wants to know up to date. The job interview went swimmingly- but- as per my usual- i have zero idea what that actually means. I mean it's the 8th interview I've had, and the chick loved me- but that means nothing in the real world of getting real jobs...so anyhow- i'll find out if i got it this week barring some disaster of library HRness. In other news- I so finished my huge paper and am now done with my class much to my bittersweet relief. The relief is easy to understand- who likes writing papers? the bittersweet comes from the fact that my classmates were really cool people and I got to know all five of them and a) it's rare to find cool history grad students and b) now my excuse for hanging out with them is somewhat weakened- ie no class for which to gather. I am excited but somewhat weary of my next class- Jewish Philosophy- eeek. we'll see what tortures and discoveries await.
yeah anyway- so as most of you know- I've been seeing a lot of doctors as I try to figure out exactly what surgery to have and what surgeon is the lucky slicer-and-dicer (to put it succinctly). So upon the recommendation of the surgeon in LR I went to see a Rheamotologist to make sure I didn't have the early stages of Rheamatoid Arthritis (which would be mega-no-bueno). Thankfully- I don't have that. But- I do have Fibromyalgia- which turns out is a sleeping disorder which means I don't ever get deep sleep which means my body doesn't heal correctly so that's why i'm sore and in pain a lot....hummm- i thought that was just a normal part of the whole jaw-pain/chronic headache deal so I guess it's good that there's an actual explanation. so the only thing to treat it is medicine so i done started that up. and they're also doing a lot of test for this other rare arthritis that attacks your very low spine and jaws and it only occurs in women. so that's weird. but like i said- it's rare- so i probably don't have it. woohoo. anyhow- so that's what went down last week. oh and we had this huge campus house cook-out which rocked major. I made brats and kraut and goatie's famous baked beans. it was good times i tell you what. ok- keep it real- but not too real. oh- and if you want to watch some quality movies- go rent "Finding Neverland" and "Enigma" cause they're both genius. not even kidding. lata.

Das Job in F-town

So there's a sweet job opening up in my library and I applied and I have an interview this Wednesday. Wish me luck. It pays over 7,000 more a year which would make a huge difference on my medical bills- so if I find out from that big-shot doctor in Dallas in three weeks that the doctor up here can do the surgery AND I get this job it is possible that I could stay up here. We'll see what God's got cooken' eh? Meanwhile I haven't made much progress on the 15 page paper for my class which is technically due TODAY so I need to get cracken' seriously (I got an extension:(). I mean I read a lot yesterday but yesterday was supposed to be write-a-lot time. oooops.
guten tag noch.